I asked and you answered. I’ve only read a handful of these books, so I’m not endorsing them or the authors, simply reporting the answers from friends, family, and followers.
I found that most of the authors suggested are white males, who as you may guess, do not hold a monopoly on health Christian relationships or great sex. If you have suggestions, please let me know so I can add them to the list. In the meantime, I would strongly encourage you read outside the box!
Which Christian dating/marriage books have either helped or misled you?
Here’s what helped.
- Come As You Are: The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life by Emily Nagoski
- Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman
- Damaged Goods by Dianna Anderson
- Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
- You and Me Forever by Francis Chan
- Vertical Marriage by Dave and Ann Wilson
- The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment by Clifford and Joyce Penner
- Good Christian Sex: Why Chastity Isn’t the Only Option-And Other Things the Bible Says About Sex by Bromleigh McCleneghan
- A Celebration Of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God’s Gift of Sexual Intimacy by Douglas Rosenau
- Sacred Marriage by Gary Thomas
- The Sacred Search: What If It’s Not Who You Marry, But Why? by Gary Thomas
- Beyond Shame: Creating a Healthy Sex Life on Your Own Terms by Matthias Roberts
- Saving Your Marriage Before it Starts by Les and Leslie Parrott
- How to Get a Date Worth Keeping by Henry Cloud
- The Meaning of Marriage by Tim and Kathy Keller
- Modern Kinship by David and Constantino Khalaf
- Husband in Pursuit & Wife in Pursuit by Ryan and Selena Frederick
- Beyond Sex Roles by Gilbert Bilezikian
- Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage by Elizabeth Gilbert
- Sex God by Rob Bell
These have mixed reviews.
- The Mingling of Souls: God’s Design for Love, Marriage, Sex, and Redemption by Matt Chandler
- Real Sex: The Naked Truth About Chastity by Lauren Winner
And these seemed to be unhelpful.
- I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris
- Boy Meets Girl by Joshua Harris
- Emotional Purity by Heather Arnel Paulsen
- When God Writes Your Love Story by Eric and Leslie Ludy
- Captivating Revised and Updated: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul by John and Stasi Eldredge
- Dateable by Hayley DiMarco and Justin Lookadoo
- Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: A Response to Evangelical Feminism by John Piper and Wayne Grudem
- Passion and Purity by Elisabeth Elliot
- Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
- Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage by Kevin Leman
- Before You Meet Prince Charming: A Guide to Radiant Purity by Sarah Mally
- Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together by Mark and Grace Driscoll
If you disagree with any of the characterizations above, I’d love to hear! Obviously, there’s a lot more to say on these subjects that these few authors can cover, but it’s a start. Knowing some of the authors listed, some books most likely disagree in certain ways.
I asked this question with “purity culture” in mind. I’m curious to hear if you experienced this growing up and if there were teachings or books that promoted this in your church or religious context.